Jonathon Simmons was on his knees next to his hotel bed, eyes closed and hands pressed together in prayer. “Please Lord, I don’t know what the purpose of these trials are, but give me guidance in this time of doubt,” he mumbled to the empty room. All of a sudden, as in response to this…
Read MorePatrick McCaw 18 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (5/16/2017)
Even if you removed all of Patrick McCaw’s points from Golden State’s total, AND all the points that were the result of his assists, the Warriors still would have won this game. That’s how much of a beating it was for San Antonio. Does that fact lessen McCaw’s significant accomplishments? Kinda. It’s a well-known rule…
Read MoreOtto Porter 20 Points Full Highlights (5/15/2017)
I was going to write a big long description about how I thought Otto Porter should have tried harder to make his presence known in this series, but now that I’m looking at his stats from the seven games, it turns out that, other than a goose egg in game 6, Porter was scoring rather…
Read MoreKelly Olynyk 26 Points Full Highlights (5/15/2017)
From playing synthesizers in a British Columbian Prog band called Starcubism to being the deciding factor in a game 7 of the NBA playoffs, Kelly Olynyk has come a long way in the world. The man who once contributed keyboards and songwriting to the seminal release “Visions of Mars (Cubistic Journey Part I)”, the first…
Read MoreManu Ginobili 17 Points Full Highlights (5/14/2017)
I don’t know how Manu Ginobili will be able to watch the highlights of his performance (which he surely will because that’s what NBA players do, watch themselves on YouTube) and not think to himself “I can totally play another year of basketball at the highest level”. Watch them for yourself. These are not the…
Read MoreRudy Gobert All 235 Dunks Full Highlights (2016-17 Season Dunkilation)
“Monsieur Gobert! Monsieur Gobert! Your esteemed guest has arrived!” Rudy Gobert rolled his eyes at his bumbling, bespectacled butler. “If you weren’t such an intolerable fool, Remi, you would be able to take his coat and invite him in to the parlor without running to me for guidance.” “Yes, sir! Of course, sir! I will…
Read MoreAvery Bradley 27 Points Full Highlights (5/12/2017)
If I was Avery Bradley, I would be pissed off. Not just because my team lost the game, but because my apparently “clutch” shot with 39 seconds left in the game became significantly less clutch after three more shots were subsequently made by other players. Bradley was supposed to be the hero, but Beal, Horford,…
Read MoreTrevor Ariza 20 Points Full Highlights (5/11/2017)
Well, Trevor Ariza showed up I guess? He was the only Rocket who played acceptably from a box-score perspective as the Rockets got blown out by almost forty in an elimination game. If you take his 6-of-12 shooting out, the Rockets don’t even shoot 25% from the field for the game (16 of 65), are…
Read MoreJonathon Simmons 18 Points Full Highlights (5/11/2017)
Jonathon Simmons: Better than James Harden? Let’s take a look at the facts: POINTS: Simmons scored 18 points in this game. Harden scored 10 (LOL [lots of laughs]). ADVANTAGE: Simmons DEFENSE: Simmons plays defense. Harden doesn’t. ADVANTAGE: Simmons PASSING: Simmons had four assists. Harden had seven. But Harden’s assists were just a product of him…
Read MoreAvery Bradley 29 Points Full Highlights (5/10/2017)
Usually, when a player scores a large amount of points in the first half of a game (in Avery Bradley’s case, 25), I am unable to control my body’s natural responses to the event and I lose the ability to control my hype. My BHL (blood hype level) spikes and I will behave erratically, then…
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