Screw off with this “retirement tour” BS. It’s so corny. Luckily, for his part, Dirk Nowitzki seems slightly embarrassed by the whole thing. So I’m not blaming him (unlike how I’m blaming Dwyane Wade, FOH outta here with that jersey swap garbage) for people wanting to make a big show out of his retirement. Except…
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Jalen Brunson 18 Points/9 Assists Full Highlights (3/8/2019)
As of right now, the SRROTY (second-round rookie of the year) race is down to two players: Jalen Brunson and Mitchell Robinson. Thrown in Rodions Kurucs if you want, but he’s been in a bit of a slumpy-wump recently, while Brunson and Robinson are surging. Both of these true candidates are averaging around 19 minutes…
Read MoreLuka Doncic 24 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/8/2019)
My first impression was that Luka “Lukadris” Doncic maybe did just a little bit of statpadding at the end of this game when the outcome (a Mavs loss) was already determined. Maybe I sorta think that, but the Mavs had closed the gap to the point where three Doncic triples in a row would have…
Read MoreJustin Jackson 18 Points Full Highlights (3/6/2019)
When Justin Jackson got traded from the Kings to the Mavs as part of the earth-shattering Harrison Barnes trade, I’m sure there was a subset of Mavs fans who thought some or all of the following things: -“The Mavs are getting a good young shooting guard to strengthen the bench” -“Justin Jackson could be a…
Read MoreLuka Doncic 31 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (3/6/2019)
We are honestly way, way, WAY past the point of Luka Doncic being too good for my channel. That point was passed a long time ago. However, since he was not actually named an All-Star (except the All-Star of all of our hearts), my self-imposed rules say that I can’t remove him from my channel…
Read MoreDwight Powell Career High 26 Points Full Highlights (3/6/2019)
While expertly editing (actually, I prefer the term “composing”) this Dwight Powell highlights package for the consumption of the drooling YouTube hordes, I couldn’t help but wonder: is the pronunciation of Dwight a dialectical thing? The main Mavs commentator always calls him “Duh-Wight”. Meanwhile, I just call him “Dwite”. When Dwight Howard was still alive…
Read MoreDwight Powell 20 Points/6 Assists/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/4/2019)
This is a career high for Dwight Powell in the “assists” category. I put that in quotes because the first five of these assists range between “barely passable” (get it, passable????? hahahahah) and “Jokic-esque BS handoff that should never be an assist”. Luckily the final one is a nice spinning drop off to a Dorian…
Read MoreLuka Doncic 22 Points Full Highlights (3/2/2019)
I was promised lobs from Luka Doncic to Dirk Nowitzki. Am the only one who remembers Doncic’s first interview after he got drafted where he said “Me and Dirk, it’s going to be Lob City”? I can’t find the clip of him saying it on YouTube, but that’s probably because his crack team of media…
Read MoreJalen Brunson 24 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (2/27/2019)
OFFICIAL 2018 DRAFTEES FROM VILLANOVA POWER RANKINGS [AMENDED FEBRUARY 2019 EDITION] 1. Jalen Brunson NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP GAP OF VICTORY 2. Mikal Bridges 3. Omari Spellman 4. Donte DiVincenzo This is basically the same ordering as the initial power ranking except that Spellman has now surpassed DiVincenzo. It’s been so long since DiVincenzo has played that…
Read MoreLuka Doncic 26 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (2/27/2019)
I was all set to write the next installment in my long-running (okay, not-so-long running) Luka Doncic Taco Bell saga for this video description. But my enthusiasm for the project has taken a serious hit tonight. Not because I like Luka Doncic any less than I did before, but for other, gastronomical reasons. Basically, I…
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