Ah yes, the fabled “career-high in career-highs”. The most storied of all basketball accomplishments. A performance so far out of the norm, that all one can do is gaze with childlike awe at the expertly compiled highlight package. No surprise that Ish “Dish” Smith achieved this accolade while a member of the 76ers, a team…
Read MoreLuis Scola 15 Points Full Highlights (3/1/2015)
“A two-pronged attack at Queen Charlotte Bay and the Byron Sound…that should be enough to retake the west island,” Luis Scola mumbled, standing above a table-sized map of the Falkland Islands. He pushed little figurines to an fro. “West Point would be ours in a day, the perfect base for the rest of our operation…”…
Read MoreCody Zeller 16 Points/5 Dunks Full Highlights (3/1/2015)
New theory: perhaps the reason why Cody “Zody” Zeller has looked like a bust most of his career is because he played with a point guard who didn’t want to pass (Kemba Walker). Now that he gets to play for a while with a more effective ball-distributor in Mo Williams, he starts to look like…
Read MoreJeremy Lamb 14 Points Full Highlights (3/1/2015)
With each game where Jeremy Lamb received a “DNP – Coach’s Decision”, Scott Brooks further cements his well-earned status as the worst coach in the league. Tonight he had no choice, and Jeremy was unwillingly allowed to play some actual meaningful basketball. And look what happened. 14 points, good efficiency, stuff that the Thunder could…
Read MoreAndre Miller 12 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (3/1/2015)
Andre Miller should be HOFer. Straight up. Try to debate me on this point. You will lose. Don’t even try bringing up his scoring averages. Basketball is a team game, and a player who makes his teammates better by his presence does not himself need to chuck the ball like a maniac. The curators of…
Read MoreDonatas Motiejunas 16 Points Full Highlights (3/1/2015)
I’m sure the Houston Rockets don’t have a problem with attendance these days, but I have an idea to spice up the somewhat homogenous basketball action on display: Lithuanian Heritage Night! It’s perfect: Donatas Motiejunas is Lithuanian, a country people don’t know anything about, so it fulfills the dual roles of enlightenment and fun! Replace…
Read MoreTrey Burke 23 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (2/28/2015)
You probably knew this already, but Trey “Treyburkulosis” Burke is a chucker of the highest order. It didn’t even hit me until just now. Despite being a very poor shooter, he is second on the Jazz in shot attempts. Now I understand why Jazz fans think he’s the worst player in the league. He is…
Read MoreAlexey Shved 15 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (2/28/2015)
Alexey excitedly punched the familiar number into his phone and waited with a big smile as it rang. After much ringing, it was answered. “Hi Shabazz! This is Alexey!” he greeted to his best friend Shabazz Muhammad. “Oh hey man what’s up, you actually kinda got me at a bad time, I really can’t talk…
Read MoreDennis Schröder 16 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (2/28/2015)
Dënniß ßchrööder must have been wearing his special lederhosen underneath his jersey, because he just rammed the entirety of his secret-recipe wienerschnitzel down the throats of the unresisting Miami Heat defenders. When they were done choking that down, he followed it up with a course of authentic spätzle, and for desert, a steaming pile of…
Read MoreTim Hardaway Jr. 22 Points Full Highlights (2/28/2015)
The Knicks have now won two games in a row, a happening that ranks way up there for most improbable this season. I honestly didn’t think they had more than a single win left in them. You’re watching this video, so you know how bad New York’s roster is. Just looking at it makes me…
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