The Magic’s new slogan seems to be “That’s Pure Magic”. It appears to be most often used after a spectacular basketball play made by a member of the team. It was applied to Aaron Gordon after he made a three-pointer. Now, a shot from that distance is definitely a laudable achievement, but it hardly qualifies…
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Tobias Harris 21 Points Full Highlights (11/4/2014)
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. This video is 111 seconds long, with 60 frames per second (I swear). That means 6600 pictures are contained in this video, plus 1 for the thumbnail. If this description were to accurately describe the contents of this highlight package, I would have to write roughly…
Read MoreElfrid Payton 16 Points/9 Assists Full Highlights (11/1/2014)
Question to people who are more knowledgeable about style-related matters than I: what is Elfrid Payton’s hair called? Is it an afro? I would say no, unless it actually is. Is it a flattop? Kinda. Not like Noel-style though. Whatever the correct term, he’s second in the league to Chris Douglas-Roberts for having rad locks….
Read MoreNikola Vucevic 23 Points Full Highlights (10/30/2014)
“Confìteor Deo omnipotènti et vobis, fratres, quia peccàvi nimis cogitatiòne, verbo, òpere et omissiòne, mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. Ego sum melior quam Dwight. Ideo precor beàtam Mariam semper Virginem, omnes Angelos et Sanctos, et vos, fratres, oràre pro me ad Dòminum Deum nostrum.” – Nikola Vucevic, after desecrating the bodies of Gortat…
Read MoreBen Gordon 22 Points Full Highlights (10/30/2014)
The Orlando Magic went out and got Ben Gordon so he could provide a veteran presence on a team that is severely lacking in veterans (Luke Ridnour doesn’t count because he’s from Idaho). Gordon can teach these young guys how to win! Or so the thinking goes. To test out the prevailing wisdom, I went…
Read MoreEvan Fournier 21 Points Full Highlights (10/30/2014)
Evan Fournier is a great fit for what the Magic are trying to do, which is, I assume, to collect as many young, talented players as they can while avoiding any who might become an All-Star some day. That’s exactly what Fournier is. He’s a pretty good player, and easy to like as a foreigner…
Read MoreTobias Harris 25 Points Full Highlights (10/28/2014)
There is always some disorientation when a new NBA season starts. I pay fairly close attention to the goings-on around the league during the offseason, but it makes no difference; Luke Ridnour in a Magic jersey just doesn’t jive. And I refuse to believe that a player named “Kostas Papanikolaou” exists. He’s surely a conjuration…
Read MoreAaron Gordon 11 Points Magic Debut Full Highlights (10/28/2014)
Slumbering serenely in my bed, I dreamt of all the normal subjects: females, unrecognized anxieties, food, and things that my waking brain does not let me recall. Whatever my dream was at that moment, it didn’t matter, for I felt myself being poked in the back, and I awoke. My girlfriend Nadine often does this…
Read MoreKyle O’Quinn 20 Points Full Highlights (4/14/2014)
“The natural beauty of Ireland is unparalleled. There is a reason they call this ‘the Emerald Isle’. The verdant greenth of Eire’s hills and valleys is poetic in its majesty.” Kyle O’Quinn panned the camera across the landscape, aiming to give his future viewers a window into his beautiful homeland. He continued speaking in an…
Read MoreTobias Harris 18 Points Full Highlights (4/13/2014)
Tobias Harris is gone. The Bucks traded him for a bunch of players who aren’t even with the team anymore. There is still lingering pain and sadness, but where those things reside, there also is happiness and relief. Yin and Yang. Chuckers and defensive specialists. I know it may be hard to see through they…
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