Brandon Knight 34 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (12/23/2014)

Illuminated only by the glowing light of his laptop screen, Brandon Knight carefully scrolled through her Facebook photos, one by one. The friend request with Bucks cheerleader Kyra had been consummated not ten minutes prior, and now he had access to all of her bikini photos. Hundreds of them, perhaps thousands. There had even been an album called “In the locker room!!!!! LOL”, but he was saving that one for later. There might be underwear shots in that one, and he didn’t want to squander the good stuff right away.

In the expanse of his online friends list, he saw Kyra’s name. A plan began to form in Brandon’s mind, a plan that was sourced not in the rationality of his primate mind, but rather, his semi-aroused state. What if he sent a sexy message to her and then pretended it was for somebody else? Then, he would know for sure whether Kyra was down for some D or not. Brandon had never been good at figuring out that kind of stuff, but this plan would allow him to glean knowledge of her feelings without putting himself too far out there.

Nothing could go wrong, he told himself. Even if she was disgusted and unfriended him, he could still look at the pictures, right? They were in his computer cache, or something. That’s what Nate had said anyway.

Opening up a new chat window, Brandon considered his message. Should he be extremely crude, or should he be romantic? Or maybe just “cute”? He typed out several different drafts: “hey cutie ❤”, “i just wanna b in ur arms right now bae,” and “u want sum fuk? brandon kno u need his tube steak.” Obviously, the best outcome from his message would that Kyra and him would hook up right this very night, but that could also go drastically wrong, to the point where he might never hook up with ANY cheerleader. If he sent her just a cute little message that could easily be played off as being meant for another woman, her heart might be warmed to the point that they could hook up within two to three weeks.

In the end, Brandon settled on the simple, “for Christmas all I want is you.” It was fully typed out, triple-checked for typos or unintended hidden meanings, and now Brandon’s shaking index finger hovered over the “enter” key. It was now or never.

He pressed it.

Nothing happened immediately, which Brandon took as a good sign. Kyra had not gone offline. She had not unfriended him. But as the seconds passed, he became more and more anxious, wondering why on earth he had dared to attempt this ill-conceived plan.

Now her icon noted that she was typing a response. Brandon squeezed his eyes closed and looked away from the screen, not wanting to know what kind of havoc he had just brought upon their not-yet-existent relationship.

After a long pause, he opened one eye and read the response. “Ummmm OK? LOL”

She hadn’t even called him out on it, and she wasn’t even repulsed! He pumped his fist in joy. The next message was easy to compose, emboldened as he was: “oops that was for some1 else haha…but ur on my list too!”

Kyra’s response was being typed immediately; that meant she was into the conversation! Brandon was almost ecstatic in his triumph, thinking that perhaps the “locker room” album would not even have to be opened at all.

“ur so sweet. c u at the next game! ????”

Brandon knight typed out a hurried “cya” and closed the chat window. His heart was racing. Was this what the guys called “scoring”? Had he just “scored?” It sure felt like he had. Closing the laptop and crawling into his bed, a smile remained plastered to his face. This was truly going to be the best Christmas ever.

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