“Luc, we got a problem, man.”
Luc Richard Mbah a Moute looked up from tying his shoes. “What are you talking about?”
Jerami looked sternly at his veteran teammate. “You remember that sex advice you gave me a few days ago?”
Luc, who gave a lot of advice to everybody on the team, didn’t specifically remember, and he said so.
Putting his hands on his hips, Jerami continued, “You told me that if I put it in her belly button, that’s how you make babies. Well, that’s where I put my implement, and that’s where all the baby batter went, and I still ain’t a father.”
Luc shook his head knowingly. “Jerami, it takes at least a few weeks before your girl has the baby. It’s growing inside her stomach right now. Trust me, you did it right.”
The hard expression on Jerami’s face immediately cleared away. “Oh. Okay,” he said. Then his face showed signs of worry. “Luc, I ain’t ready to be a daddy yet. My girl’s always talkin’ about makin’ a little family but I don’t know the first thing about babies.”
Luc got up, put his arm around Jerami, and pulled him into a side-hug. “Listen. When you put it in the belly button, it doesn’t make a baby every time. Just sometimes. If your girl doesn’t already have a fat pregnant belly, you’re in the clear.”
“Thanks Luc, you’re the best,” Jerami said happily, remembering that his bae’s stomach was very normal-sized this morning. “I’ll let you know if I have any more questions.”
“You do that, my rook.”