Tonight was a great matchup of two exciting shooting guards, Devin Booker and Sasha Vujacic. But which one is better? Let’s take look at the facts with truthfulness.
Team victory status:
Vujacic’s team, the Knicks, were the winners of this basketball contest. Booker’s team, the Suns, were the losers. Advantage: Vujacic
Points (career):
Vujacic has scored 2840 points over his 8-year career. Booker has scored only 683. Advantage: Vujacic
Points (tonight):
Vujacic scored 23, while Booker scored 32. There is an obscure branch of learning called “maths” which seems to indicate that Booker scored more than Vujacic tonight. I remain unconvinced. Advantage: Vujacic
Amount of vet savvy contained in testicles:
Vujacic’s scrotum is full to the brim with veteran savvy. It’s practically leaking out of his sack-pores. Booker’s balls, on the other hand, are almost completely devoid of the stuff. Advantage: Vujacic
Clutch free throws made in playoffs:
Vujacic has made several free throws during playoff games that could be considered “clutch”. Booker has not made any, in part because he has never made the playoffs and in part because he is a huge choker who sometimes accidentally makes free throws for the opposing team. Advantage: Vujacic
Rapport with Kobe:
Vujacic’s name can be found in the contacts list on Kobe’s phone. There is a “Booker” there also, but it’s actually Trevor Booker, not Devin. Advantage: Vujacic
Emotional stability:
Vujacic is the paragon of mental health, having the ability to shed tears in the heat of battle. Booker is an unstable madman on the brink of a total psychotic breakdown, a breakdown which hasn’t yet occurred only because he is constantly on a regimen of pills that would make Michael Jackson faint. Advantage: Vujacic
The facts have been examined with honesty. It has been determined conclusively: Sasha Vujacic is better than Devin Booker, and it’s not even close.