New suggestion for the Pistons’ commentators: whenever Luke Kennard knocks down a three-pointer or hits one of his smooth, confident midrange jimbos, you have to yell “He just put them in the KENNEL!” This works on so many levels. It’s like an onion of metaphors where you keep peeling away layers to find more layers:
1. “Kennard” and “kennel” share their first syllable. Boom. Catchy.
2. Kennels are for dogs, so there is an element of dehumanization and embarrassment that occurs when you assert that human beings should be placed in them.
3. Kennard’s midrange shots are embarrassing for defenders because defenders aren’t expecting that type of shot in today’s NBA
4. The arena could play dog barking noises whenever Kennard hits a shot
This is such a good idea that I’m hesitant to even write about it in this video description. It will probably get stolen by somebody in the Pistons organization who is cyberstalking me. Warning to the Pistons organization: if you steal my idea and don’t pay me the required $25,000, I will stop making highlights for Pistons players forever, and then even fewer people will care about your stupid team.