Some notes about Thomas Bryant/this game since I’m too lazy to weave these disparate points together into a logical narrative:
-If you ever wondered whether Thomas Bryant could dunk, you don’t have to wait much longer unless you paused the video to read the description.
-Was Thomas Bryant always this chubby-looking? The dude I remember from the Lakers was wiry. But those could be false memories implanted by US government agencies to influence me into using my highlights channel as a tool for the repression of revolutionary thought among my subscriber base. So I don’t even know.
-Steve Buckhantz called Thomas Bryant “Thomas Robinson” at the end, but I forgive him, because I wouldn’t want to pay attention to the game either if my team was getting blown out by thirty points. When that happens to me, I just turn off the game and do something else. He doesn’t have that option. He can’t just turn off his life. Except he can.
-Thomas Bryant’s jumpshot is ten times better than Dwight’s, but ten times worse than Jason Smith’s. I’m going off prime-era Jason Smith here because I haven’t seen him play this season.
-I am glad that Dwight had back surgery.
-Ian Mahinmi is theoretically also glad that Dwight had back surgery, but he only played nine minutes in this game, the lowest on the team. At least he can wipe away his tears with money.