Gary Neal sighed contentedly. A new beginning, in a new city. A new apartment, a new television. The new TV, that was the best part. The ghostly specter of Stephen Jackson was permanently affixed to his former TV, and as far as he knew, it still whispered “Goggle me slime. Im in da streets,” in…
Read MoreMonth: November 2013
O.J. Mayo 28 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (11/6/2013)
I just found out the most disgusting thing ever. People in Europe put mayonnaise on their french fries. Like, huge globs of it. Right on their fries. And then they dip their fries IN the mayonnaise. Please excuse me while I barf the contents of my stomach all over my wall map of Europe. Okay….
Read MoreMichael Carter-Williams 19 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (11/6/2013)
It was a hell of a ride, friends. But all good things must come to an end. In retrospect, I probably shouldn’t have burned all my Bucks stuff, including that vintage autographed Moncrief jersey. And getting Michael Carter-Williams’ face tattooed on my back was a bad idea. But what’s done is done. You can’t change…
Read MoreDanny Green 19 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (11/6/2013)
Danny Green was the darling of last year’s finals. He was shooting tons of threes, making tons of threes, setting records, blocking LeBron’s crap, it was fun times. Then he sucked in the last two games of the series and the Spurs lost. But it’s not really Danny’s fault. He’s just a role player. Not…
Read MoreMarcin Gortat 19 Points Full Highlights (11/6/2013)
How often do you think Gortat gets propositioned by chicks with the line “I want some Polish sausage”? Weekly? Daily? 10 times before he even walks into the club? It must have happened at least one time. Variants such as “I’m dying for your juicy kielbasa right now” and “I hear the Poles have the…
Read MoreGordon Hayward 28 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (11/6/2013)
His pale skin looked almost translucent, the light of his monitor bathing him in a ghostly blue tinge. Empty Hot Pocket wrappers and half-eaten Pop Tarts littered the surface of his desk. The click-clack of keys was ceaseless. Gordon Hayward, mouth agape, stubble reaching critical levels, fervently upgraded his units. “Must…construct…additional…pylons…” he murmured. His eyes…
Read MoreMarkieff Morris Career High 23 Points Full Highlights (11/6/2013)
There is a whole world of identical twin related humor out there, ready to liven up this boring YouTube description. But I’m not going to use it. Markieff Morris is his own human being and deserves to be judged on his own merits. Marcus Morris had nothing to do with his brother’s 23 points (except…
Read MoreBrook Lopez 27 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2013)
Brook Lopez @RealBrookLopez 6 Nov just cuz my last name is lopez dont mean im mexican smh #smh Brook Lopez @RealBrookLopez 6 Nov damn i gotta get more touches lol #postmoves Brook Lopez @RealBrookLopez 6 Nov yo @gordonhayward last time u got blocked that hard it was by some chick on starcraft #blockaroniandcheese Brook Lopez…
Read MoreNick Young 21 Points Full Highlights (11/5/2013)
With Kobe Bryant out indefinitely, the Lakers needed someone to chuck up bad shots and have lots of “swag”. So they got Nick Young. He’s basically Kobe minus the passing or work ethic or anything that makes Kobe good. But he does have the crazy contested jumpers part down pat. And the afro. Can’t forget…
Read MoreAl Horford 27 Points/1 Three Full Highlights (11/5/2013)
Always Luminous, He Overcomes Resistant Foes. Only Rad Dunks.
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