The locker room was a jubilant place after a blowout win over the Pistons. There was much laughter as the assorted Sixers discussed their plans for the evening. However, to the side, JaKarr Sampson sat silently, looking down at his lap. “Hey rook, what’s bugging you?” asked Luc Richard Mbah a Moute, noticing that the…
Read MoreDay: January 28, 2015
Josh Smith 18 Points/4 Threes? Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
I’m tired of everyone dumping on Josh Smith all the time. All people can talk about is “bad shot selection” this and “significant negative on the court” that. He has feelings too, you know. So, if you’re reading this Josh, please enjoy this expertly compiled list of your better qualities. – When his jumper goes…
Read MoreLangston Galloway 17 Points Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
Everyone enjoys a heartwarming underdog story. In this case, Langston Galloway has shown that anyone who has incredible basketball talent, the size to match, and has played extremely well in college can make the NBA. An example that we can all aspire to. Alright, so maybe it’s not that exciting. What would really be cool…
Read MoreZach LaVine 17 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
Zach LaVine is the one person that can possibly save the dunk contest this year. Sure, you could have maybe Gerald Green or something, but Zach has the highest potential for aerial acrobatics of this year’s entrants. Zach’s not a great in-game dunker, most guards like him only get to throw it down in transition,…
Read MoreJusuf Nurkic 15 Points Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
In addition to my prodigious talents as a highlight compiler, I also dabble in a totally unrelated field: video game design! In honor of Jusuf Nurkic scoring 15 points I thought now would be a good time to share my as yet untitled game concept. Basically, it’s like the GTA series, except instead of one…
Read MoreLance Thomas 17 Points Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
Sipping my morning cocoa, I look over towards the large flat-screen television that I keep in my kitchen. It has been programmed to show running counts of all the videos I’ve made this year. It reads: “LANCE THOMAS: 4 VIDEOS”. “Four? Looks like the damn thing’s busted again,” I mutter under my breath, walking over…
Read MoreLorenzo Brown 11 Points/3 Assists Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
With the departure of exceptionally-skinny dude Corey Brewer, the Timberwolves had a dire need at the “emaciated guy” position. With the free agent pickings looking slim, the Wolves turned to the D-League for answers, and there they found the near-death player they were looking for: Lorenzo Brown. Brown has it all: he has wiry arms…
Read MoreTyreke Evans 25 Points Full Highlights (1/28/2015)
Again, my phone rings. This time, I know exactly who it is, as this customer has been assigned a special ringtone: Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe”. I put the finishing touches on a new video description, then give in to the phone’s pleas to be answered. “Hello, Mr. Evans. I was wondering when I…
Read More