If Michael Kidd-Gilchrist’s absolutely borked jumpshot form can be fixed into something approaching okay, I’m convinced that there is no NBA malady out there that can’t be fixed with a little know-how. DeAndre Jordan’s free throws, Brandon Jennings’ nonexistent right hand, Joakim Noah’s whirlwind jumper, MCW’s ill-conceived passes that are doomed to result in turnovers, all these things can be corrected given the correct coach and enough time.
However, some things will never be fixed. Jennifer still does not return my calls. My letters to her address go ignored, or at least, never responded to. She has probably found another man by now. But I will never find another Jennifer. She was the only one, and I screwed it up.
Hold me, bros.