Dennis Schröder put the earbuds in his ears, leaned back, and closed his eyes: his typical pregame relaxation ritual. His Hawks teammates knew not to disturb him unless absolutely necessary, for a meditative Dennis was a much better performer than a nervous Dennis. As German-language pop music flowed through his ears, Dennis relaxed fully, his…
Read MoreMonth: December 2015
Nikola Vucevic 25 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
A dedicated viewer of this channel might notice something strange: after 11 Okafor highlights, 10 Towns highlights, and 2(???) JaMychal Green highlights, this is only my second Nikola Vucevic video! I’m not racist or anything, in case that’s what you were thinking. I love Montenegro and its denizens. Montenegro and DTB are bros for life….
Read MoreJahlil Okafor 20 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
What was Jahlil Okafor’s favorite thing about prom? The punch bowl!
Read MoreJaVale McGee 10 Points/5 Dunks/3 Blocks Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
Nothing makes me happier than seeing a rejuvenated JaVale McGee up to his old tricks. The NBA just hasn’t been the same without him, and I’m not even talking about all that BS Shaqtin stuff. I’m talking about big blocks and even bigger slam-jams. And, yes, some funny faces thrown in for good measure. Sadly,…
Read MoreAndre Drummond Career High 33 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
Alright, I know I said that I was only going to care about on-court explots from now on. I said it, and I mean to follow through with it, but man, some things are just too much to ignore. Like Andre Drummond’s shoulder hair. I mean, what the hell? It’s like a carpet. A prickly…
Read MoreC.J. McCollum 27 Points Full Highlights (12/18/2015)
OFFICIAL 2015 NBA JUMP-SHOOTERS BETTER THAN CJ MCCOLLUM POWER RANKINGS 1. Stephen Curry 2. Kyle Korver 3. Klay Thompson 4. Damian Lillard 5. ????????????? 6. James Harden or something Maybe I forgot a few names, so sue me. We’re talking about jump-shot making ability here, not just threes, nor “who can jack up a bunch…
Read MoreSerge Ibaka 23 Points Full Highlights (12/17/2015)
Serge “Ibaka Gaijin” Ibaka only had one block in this game. That’s stupid. I don’t like it. He’s supposed to be an automaton that mindlessly generates blocks for his team. But one block is the same amount that Spencer Hawes got last night. Sure, Ibaka had 10 total blocks in the previous two games, but…
Read MoreJeremy Lin 35 Points Full Highlights (12/17/2015)
Jeremy Lin was curled up in his papasan along with his dog, Aethelstan. He fidgeted with his phone nervously. “What do you think, boy, should I do it?” He muttered to Aethelstan, who responded by rearranging himself so as to be more tightly wound around his owner’s legs. Jeremy sighed. He had nagged Dirk Nowitzki…
Read MoreJarrett Jack 22 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (12/16/2015)
“You can’t ignore me forever, DTB.” Startled by the unexpected voice behind me, I turn my chair away from the computer screen to find that Jarrett Jack has entered my office. This is not the first time an NBA player has intruded upon the sanctity of my abode, so I am able to respond calmly….
Read MoreIsaiah Canaan 24 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (12/16/2015)
Watching this game makes me think that Isaiah Canaan is like a Stephen Curry without the handles, playmaking ability, or MVP-ness. So basically just Curry’s three point shooting and nothing else. In this game, Canaan repeatedly makes the Hawks suck on his Canaan Balls by making a wide variety of three-point shots: deep threes, fading…
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