We need to find some way to get Fred Hoiberg to give Doug McDermott more minutes. Micky Buckets has earned the minutes, and the minutes are not being given. This is out of his hands now. He has done everything he can. We must intervene. Would telling Hoiberg that he doesn’t need to pretend to…
Read MoreMonth: December 2015
Wes Johnson 21 Points Full Highlights (12/5/2015)
“All he does is score.” Why would you say that about Wes Johnson? That doesn’t make sense in any possible interpretation of the phrase. Even if you consider strictly basketball, it’s pretty obvious that he doesn’t do all that much scoring, even when he manages to detach his posterior from the bench. In the interest…
Read MoreDerrick Favors Career High 35 Points Full Highlights (12/5/2015)
Derrick Favors drove along a barely-used desert road. It had been almost an hour since he had seen any sign of civilization, here in the barren Utah flatlands. The only lights he had seen were his rental car’s headlights, illuminating the night when he dared to use them. He was totally lost now, and he…
Read MoreBoris Diaw 16 Points Full Highlights (12/5/2015)
Boris Diaw vs. Jared Sullinger. Battle of the booties. Two big dudes with lots of donk to throw around out there on the basketball court. Biggest conflict in San Antonio since the Alamo. Which heinie would be victor? Sullinger is an up-and-coming ass-blaster (blASSter), but he was really no match for Diaw’s ass-mastery (mASStery) tonight….
Read MoreLucas Nogueira 14 Points Full Highlights (12/5/2015)
This is going to sound kind of sick, but I’m sort of half-happy that Jonas Valanciunas got injured. If Valanciunas was in possession of two intact hands, there’s no way that Lucas Nogueira (I refuse to call him “Bebe”) would get any minutes at all. No minutes for Nogueira = no chance of ever making…
Read MoreRamon Sessions 18 Points Full Highlights (12/4/2015)
Lethargy and malaise have overcome me. I know I shouldn’t be disappointed, but my heart ignores my brain like it so often does. It’s well known that Ramon Sessions is not a jumpshooter, and my expectations should have been thereby adjusted, but… This. Video. Is. Nothing. But. Layups. I can’t believe how lame this video…
Read MoreEric Bledsoe 22 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/4/2015)
At what point did Eric Bledsoe become a top ten scorer in the league? Was I in a coma or something? Or have I just been zoned out this whole time? Because I definitely don’t remember this happening and I don’t remember seeing any warning signs that it might be happening. He’s actually eleventh right…
Read MoreKristaps Porzingis 19 Points Full Highlights (12/4/2015)
If I’m Carmelo Anthony, I’m freaking out right now. In only a month, the Knicks have gone from “Melo’s Team” to “Kristaps Kristaps OMG Porzingod WOW WOW WOW Latvia’s Team”. Put another way, there are still lots and lots of people who remain unhyped about Carmelo. There are no such people when it comes to…
Read MoreD’Angelo Russell 16 Points Full Highlights (12/4/2015)
My therapist said I can’t watch Laker games anymore; Kobe’s dismal play was having a “negative impact” on my mental well-being. I guess that’s why I pay her, so she can tell me what I can and can’t do with my own life. That’s what therapy is. Anyway, that means that I’ve kind of lost…
Read MoreAllen Crabbe 18 Points Full Highlights (12/3/2015)
I have just come up with a great idea for Allen Crabbe that he can use to build up goodwill and popularity on his social media accounts like Twitter and Facebook and VK and Instachat or whatever that other one is called. Oh, and Vine. He could use it on Vine too. This will work…
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