WILLIE CAULEY-STEIN JUMPSHOT ALERT! WILLIE CAULEY-STEIN JUMPSHOT ALERT! WILLIE CAULEY-STEIN MADE A JUMPER! ALERT! ALERT! This is a new era for Willie Cauley-Stein. No longer does he have to hang around the basket and beg for scraps from his more offensively-talented teammates. Those times are over! Now he can shoot jumpshots within fifteen feet whenever…
Read MoreMonth: February 2016
Kent Bazemore 23 Points Full Highlights (2/7/2016)
I don’t want to tell you your business. You’re a free human being, and one of the benefits of your freedom is that you get to watch whatever videos on YouTube that you want. It also means that I’m free to tell you your business in the form of what you should watch, because as…
Read MoreEvan Fournier 21 Points Full Highlights (2/7/2016)
It’s official: Evan Fournier’s hairline is officially forsaking him. Officially. I suspected something was up when he doing that mini-ponytail thing last year. This year, he’s given up on that ugly thing, but he is doing a similar thing by slicking his hair from front to back, creating a type of combover that disguises somewhat…
Read MoreAvery Bradley 25 Points Full Highlights (2/7/2016)
Chronological list of times where Avery Bradley looked up to the heavens and said “Thanks, Lord”: November 26, 1990: Born August 13, 1996: Was treated to a huge banana split by his uncle Lenny. January 1, 2000: The TV didn’t instantly shut off the second the new millennium began. September 11, 2001: Wasn’t in the…
Read MoreE’Twaun Moore 17 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (2/6/2016)
How many good games does E’Twaun Moore have to have before Stacey King comes up with a catchphrase for him? Or has such a catchphrase already been devised and I’m just not watching enough Bulls games to ever hear it? Phrases such as “give me the hot sauce E’Twaun” or “table for three Mr. Moore…
Read MoreOtto Porter 20 Points Full Highlights (2/6/2016)
After a guy scores eighteen in the first half you sort of expect him to score more than twenty in the game. Am I wrong to expect that? Watching this video might SEEM fun to you, but really you should feel disappointment when you watch it. If you feel anything else you’re watching the video…
Read MoreMarkel Brown 15 Points Full Highlights (2/6/2016)
Sometimes players will thrive in a bad situation. Apparently Markel Brown is not one of those players. The NBA should have tried harder to get this guy in the dunk contest because I honestly don’t think he’s going to be in the league after this year. There’s simply no room in the NBA for undersized…
Read MoreGorgui Dieng 24 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (2/6/2016)
“Dear Diary, Today, the unimaginable happened. To preface this account, I must stress that I am very careful to check the weather forecast many times per day. If there is even a wisp of cloud floating in the sky, I will double-check to ensure that none of the cursed white sand will fall from the…
Read MoreRodney Hood 25 Points Full Highlights (2/6/2016)
Quick quiz: What were the actual events that went down during the ill-fated filming of the “Reppin’ the Hood” music video featuring DownToBuck and Rodney Hood? A. Rodney Hood smoked too much green and while waving around a shotgun (while riding shotgun with a ho on each arm) he accidentally killed a dude by shooting…
Read MoreNicolas Batum 26 Points/9 Assists Full Highlights (2/6/2016)
Cue up the melancholy music folks, because I’m about to drop a bomb of sadness on your sorry faces. Nicolas Batum is already 27 years old. That means that we only have, give or take a few years, a decade remaining of sweet Nicolas Batum highlights. A decade isn’t a very long time. 9/11 was…
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