Does anybody even remember/care about the fact that Dënniß ßchrööder has a felony on his record after he beat the tar out of some dude with his posse? There was some talk that he could get deported for it. I’m pretty sure that the US Government would want to avoid the media circus that would…
Read MoreMonth: March 2019
Royce O’Neale 17 Points Full Highlights (3/11/2019)
Before you ask me, the answer is “no”. I do not know why the video feed for this game was so screwed up. Every few seconds there’s this huge jagged line of mangled pixels running across the whole screen, getting in the way of the hot Royce O’Neale action that you willingly signed up for….
Read MoreDe’Aaron Fox 23 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2019)
Why do the Kings keep losing? I was looking forward to them making the eighth seed and breaking their neverending pattern of badness that has persisted since I started really paying attention to the NBA about a decade ago. This loss puts them squarely at .500, but being squarely at .500 isn’t good enough in…
Read MoreAnte Zizic 17 Points Full Highlights (3/11/2019)
I’m really starting to feel this Ante Zizic-Cedi Osman connection that seems to be developing. Maybe I’m suffering from recency bias due to the fact that Osman assisted Zizic four times in this game alone, but the Balkan Bros’ chemistry definitely seems like a real thing and not just me making up narratives in order…
Read MoreCedi Osman 19 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2019)
Cedi “Bootleg LeBron Replacement” Osman could very well be on the fringes of the MIP Improved Player race this season, and I’m not just saying that because the Cavaliers broadcast had a fancily-made graphic that convinced me of the legitimacy of his candidacy. Okay, so maybe the fancy graphic did sway me a little bit,…
Read MoreCollin Sexton 28 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/11/2019)
After the Cavaliers’ surprise win over the Raptors, led by a 28/5 statline from Collin Sexton that falls into the “actually good statline” category, I have taken the liberty of tabulating a list of people associated with the Raptors and their emotional state right now. kyLe LLLLLory: in shambles Kahi LLLLLLeonard: Plotting with uncLe on…
Read MorePat Connaughton 14 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2019)
I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again: it sucks to be a Bucks-themed highlights channel who specialized in scrubs and role-players while the Bucks themselves are actually good. This was a lot more fun when everything sucked, including all the players, and I could do all the Khris Middleton highlights I wanted. Now…
Read MoreAlex Len 19 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2019)
Man, I’m looking at Alex Len’s stats right now, and I’m getting ticked off that no one told me how many points he was averaging this year. 10???? That’s so many. I didn’t think he’d ever hit that threshold, and now he is, like it’s no big deal. But it is a big deal. Especially…
Read MoreJalen Brunson 18 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2019)
Okay, that’s it. Time to shut down Luka Doncic for the season. I don’t care if the Mavericks (who have a vested interest in pretend he’s healthy so they can sell more tickets) say he’s good to go. If my star rookie felt a pop in his knee and I didn’t even want to win…
Read MoreEric Gordon 26 Points Full Highlights (3/10/2019)
I really need to decide if Eric Gordon is or isn’t too good for my channel. He must not be, because this video is sitting here in front of your face right now. As of right now, he isn’t, but his threshold for points before I showcase him is pretty high. Even though he kinda…
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