downtobuck – Page 1358

Andre Drummond 18 Points/18 Rebounds Full Highlights (1/29/2013)

Andre Drummond is the perfect case study for why NBA scouting is crap. Except for a rare sure-fire prospect like LeBron or Anthony Davis it’s pretty much a crapshoot as to your draft pick being good. Players who are bad get picked comparatively high (Austin Rivers). Players who are amazing get picked comparatively low (Andre…

Andrew Bogut 12 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (1/28/2013)

Andrew Bogut is pretty much a walking injury machine. Not his fault, of course, but when people look back into the history books they’re gonna say “Andrew Bogut. Dude just couldn’t stay healthy. And why did the Bucks pick him over the GOAT Chris Paul?”. Which is too bad, because he’s actually a really good…

Ryan Anderson 22 Points/7 Threes Full Highlights (1/27/2013)

Ryan Anderson is a 3-point machine. I have heard rumors that you can hear a faint metallic clinking sound as he runs up and down the court, and the way his release never changes is simply superhuman. Has anybody checked his body for robotic implants? I never see him drinking Gatorade on the bench… W̷a̸i̴t̶,̷…

Dahntay Jones 11 Points/3 Assists Full Highlights (1/27/2013)

Dahntay Jones AKA “Dahntay’s Infehrno” has not had a very exciting career. I say this with confidence because my mental encyclopedia’s entry for the guy reads like this: “6-foot-five (ish). 30-something years old. Played for the Pacers for a few years. Never was all that great. For more information, see entry for Dominique Jones, since…

Brandon Knight Career High 31 Points/Career Low 0 Assists Full Highlights (1/27/2013)

(Note: the following may make more sense if you read the description for my first Brandon Knight highlights) Noticeable just on the edge of hearing, the dull murmur of the city broke the otherwise perfect silence of the room. Brandon Knight tossed restlessly in bed. Somewhere inside he felt he’d had this dream before… “You…

Luke Ridnour 22 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (1/26/2013)

Luke Ridnour. Is he a starting-caliber point guard? No. Was he secretly happy that Rubio injured himself? Yes. How often has he fantasized about slamming Rubio’s knees with a crowbar until they resemble undercooked Hamburger Helper? Very often. How often has he fantasized about dunking in-game? More often.

Marc Gasol 20 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (1/25/2012)

Have you seen that picture of Marc Gasol in high school? He was a total fatty. But the rolls of blubber encasing his body disguised the potential that bubbled in his veins. In between eating whole boxes of ho-hos and ding-dongs, Gasol would studiously work on his post moves and footwork, waiting patiently for the…

Kyle Korver 27 Points (8 Threes) Full Highlights (1/25/2013)

I love white three-point shooters. They’re my favorite type of player, because If I somehow by some accident made it into the NBA that’s what I would be. If any NBA talent scouts are reading this, please, don’t hesitate to get in contact with me. Kyle Korver has cemented himself as one of the very…

Mickael Gelabale 15 Points Full Highlights (1/25/2013)

I wish someone would send me a copies of the NBA Pronunciation guides. I fear I’m pronouncing a name like Saer Sene wrong when I’m telling people how big of a bust he was. Anyway, it would help if the Wizards commentators read that thing, because they cycle through many different pronunciations before settling on…

Nikola Vucevic 19 Points Full Highlights (1/24/2013)

“Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness. Be extremely mysterious, even to the point of soundlessness. Thereby you can be the director of the opponent’s fate.” – Sun Tzu Tonight’s homework assignment: Figure out what the heck that quote has to do with Nikola Vucevic. I want a 1 page, single-spaced essay to…