It has come to my attention that there is a very hot female model whose name is CJ Miles. I’m sure that’s fine for you guys, but ever since I swore off women forever, I try not to look at pictures of pretty women. If I ever accidentally see one (like when I’m searhing for…
Read MoreJordan Clarkson 26 Points/6 Assists Full Highlights (4/12/2015)
Jordan Clarkson lingered in the locker room after the game. The off-season was fast approaching for him and his teammates, and he wanted to enjoy the postgame atmosphere for a little while longer. He closed his eyes as he relaxed in front of his locker, contemplating all that he had accomplished this year, as well…
Read MoreJohn Jenkins 17 Points Full Highlights (4/12/2015)
Call me crazy, but I still think John Jenkins can be a good player in the NBA. Injuries have screwed him over, and he hasn’t gotten a true chance to show what he can do, at least not since the end of his rookie year. The Hawks are too good now to give him the…
Read MoreNoah Vonleh 16 Points/2 Dunks Full Highlights (4/12/2015)
80 games into the season for the Charlotte Hornets, their prized rookie, Noah Vonleh, has finally achieved the fabled “actually good game”. Not just an “okay game” or a “that could definitely have been worse game”, but a real, legit, authentic, “actually good game”. I didn’t think it was going to happen, honestly. Nerlens Noel…
Read MoreJodie Meeks 24 Points Full Highlights (4/12/2015)
How many of you realize that Jodie Meeks had a 42-point game last year? I remember, of course, because I am not a weak humanoid but rather a machine that is incapable of forgetfulness. Meat-sacks such as yourself, blessed not without persistent and infallible storage systems, could easily fail to recall such a tiny scrap…
Read MoreGerald Green 23 Points Full Highlights (4/12/2015)
Another promising season for the Phoenix Suns is coming to a close amidst a haze of disappointment. No playoff games to be had, not in the brutal Western Conference. Fingers point this way and that, eager to cast blame upon those they deem at fault. The locker room is severed on fault lines, fault lines…
Read MoreC.J. McCollum 26 Points Full Highlights (4/11/2015)
If you’re not ultra-hyped for C.J. McCollum, you should get yourself checked out at a professional doctor or something. He has lately been beasting out his mind thanks to the timely injuries of Wes Matthews and Arron Afflalo. His stats are so sick that you would have to be comatose to not get hyped when…
Read MoreJaKarr Sampson Career High 18 Points Full Highlights (4/11/2015)
The 76ers just showed the world that a lineup consisting entirely of small forwards can compete to the end with a team that has a former MVP on it. JaKarr Sampson, who is, unsurprisingly, a small forward, was dubbed “Point Guard for a Day” by the Sixers’ coaching staff and made the most out of…
Read MoreZach LaVine Career High 37 Points Full Highlights (4/11/2015)
Cole Aldrich, JaKarr Sampson, Trevor Booker, Glenn Robinson, and Zach LaVine sat in the otherwise empty television studio. “Where is everybody else? I thought everyone who was playing tonight was invited to be in the studio audience of this Oprah show. Andrew said he’d be here, for sure.” Zach LaVine remarked as he looked around…
Read MoreTrevor Booker Career High 36 Points Full Highlights (4/11/2015)
Which is the better performance, Trevor Booker’s 36 or Wilt’s 100? Let’s take a look at the facts. Wilt was playing against players so inferior to himself that an apt comparison would be Trevor playing against a middle-school girl’s B team. Advantage: Booker. Trevor played in a packed arena brimming with playoff-like intensity, while Wilt…
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