Rip “Van Winkle” Hamilton is getting kind of old. I’m pretty sure he’s played his last game as a Bull. But is this the last game of a great career? I wouldn’t be surprised. But it’s hard to tell if he’s really and truly washed up or if it’s just injuries and Thibodeau’s lunacy. He…
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Marco Belinelli 16 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (5/10/2013)
Dear Marco, I’m sorry I broke into your house and ate all your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Everyone makes mistakes. Also, if you could send me your real crostini recipe that would be great. The one I stole from your house sucks. I think you planted it so that I would not discover the genuine recipe….
Read MoreCarlos Boozer 21 Points Full Highlights (5/10/2013)
Carlos Boozer @MisterCBooz 11 May just cuz my name is carlos dont mean im hispanic smh #smh Carlos Boozer @MisterCBooz 11 May damn @NazrMohammed just went fuckin crazy lol #terrorists #alqaeda Carlos Boozer @MisterCBooz 11 May @carmeloanthony my jumpers taste like honeynut cheerios cuz guess where my hands been #tunatown Carlos Boozer @MisterCBooz 11 May…
Read MoreMarco Belinelli 22 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (5/2/2013)
I love Tom Thibodeau. His rotations are so ridiculous. Marco Belinelli played four minutes in game four of this series, but due to Luol Deng’s “flu-like symptoms” (code term for too much partying), Marco played forty minutes last night. And here’s something crazier: Derrick Rose is totally healthy, but Thibodeau didn’t even play him one…
Read MoreNate Robinson 34 Points Full Highlights (4/27/2013)
We all are contented with how our respective days went, considering we got to watch one of the greatest games of the season, between the Bulls and Nets, play out before our eyes. Except for you. Your girlfriend dragged you to another crappy art film followed by a late lunch at a pretentious vegan hippie…
Read MoreCarlos Boozer 22 Points/16 Rebounds Full Highlights (4/25/2013)
Carlos “Booze Cruise” Boozer seems to be a good player, if you just look at his stats. 22 points! 16 rebounds! Holy buckets! However, Bulls fans hate his guts. How could a player who averages 16 and 10 be an object of such deep consternation? I took to the internet to find out. Below are…
Read MoreJimmy Butler Career High 28 Points Full Highlights (4/9/2013)
The phone rang. “Hello, this is Jimmy speaking, how can I…” “Jimmy, you’ve got to go! GO! Right now. They’ve found me, I don’t know how, but they’re coming for you next! I can hear them coming! Run! AAAUUGGHH!” Jimmy could hear the muffled sounds of gunshots through the phone. He ended the call and…
Read MoreNate Robinson 25 Points/7 Threes/6 Assists Full Highlights (3/30/2013)
Basketball is too height-based, with tall scrubs getting a pass because of their “physical tools” while short scrubs wash out of the league. So I’m going to form a basketball league where the maximum height is 6’2”. That way Nate Robinson could play his natural position (shooting guard) without being at a half-foot height disadvantage,…
Read MoreNate Robinson 34 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (3/18/2013)
Nate Robinson is a nice reminder that us normal sized people can have a shot in the NBA. Until you remember that he is an elite physical specimen, probably capable of playing in any sport that he wanted to. He does demonstrate a bit of “little-man” syndrome on the court, as you would expect. He’s…
Read MoreCarlos Boozer 21 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/15/2013)
It is my impression that Bulls fans aren’t very happy with Carlos Boozer’s play their team. But you take a look at his stats and think “Wow what are they complaining about, the Booze Cruise is putting up really nice numbers!”. But stats don’t tell the whole story. The story that goes something like this:…
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