Screw computers. DownToBuck wanted to make some highlights last night. Of who? Gerald Green of course. 41 points, hot damn. 8 threes, oh man. One of the most exciting games of the season, and a scintillating performance by one of the league’s rising stars. So I get the clips, artfully arrange them in the usual…
Read MoreTag: Toronto Raptors
Greivis Vasquez 26 Points/8 Assists Full Highlights (2/27/2014)
Greivis “Gravy” Vasquez is the second coming of our lord and savior Jose Calderon. He’s a guy that can score and rack up dimes, but his lack of defensive ability stops him from helping his team as much as you think he should. He even has the shoddy-looking “Calderon Beard”. The only real difference between…
Read MoreJonas Valanciunas 18 Points Full Highlights (2/21/2014)
Jonas Valanciunas sat on his ratty old couch, huddled up in blankets, closely shaven head peeking out like a meerkat from its hole. His heater had gone out again, and the Canadian winter was harsh and unforgiving. His television, however, was still in perfect working order, and it cast a bluish-white glow over the otherwise…
Read MorePatrick Patterson 22 Points Full Highlights (2/10/2014)
Patrick Patterson has bounced around the league quite a bit since being drafted by the Rockets. Why was he traded for Thomas Robinson? He’s way better than that guy. I get that he wasn’t a good fit on the Kings and so he played like crap. He’s not a great fit on the Raptors either,…
Read MoreAmir Johnson 22 Points Full Highlights (1/29/2014)
You know you’re a great player when an entire country is named after you. Like Michael Jordan. And, uh, Jordan Crawford. And Amir Johnson. Sure, United Arab Emirates isn’t exactly the same spelling, but I’d say it still counts. But under no circumstances should he ever visit there. That country is like 60% dudes. No…
Read MoreJonas Valanciunas 20 Points Full Highlights (1/27/2014)
Jonas Valanciunas sat in front of his glowing TV in the otherwise darkened studio apartment. Arrayed on the table in front of him were a myriad of snack items: cheez doodlez, nacho chips with assorted dips, and an untouched assortment of traditional Lithuanian baked goods courtesy of his mother. The only evidence that they had…
Read MorePatrick Patterson 17 Points Full Highlights (1/19/2014)
“Hey Internet, This is my first blog post ever. I don’t really know what I’m going to write, but I promise it will be interesting. Toronto weather is pretty crummy this time of year so there’s not much else to do other than compose lengthy dissertations on topics that interest me. LOL I promise it…
Read MoreKyle Lowry 24 Points/6 Assists/6 Threes Full Highlights (1/17/2014)
Raymond Felton @RFeltonGBMS 12h Yo @Klow7 nice game 2nite, 2 bad u looked rly fat out there tho #lardass #realtalk Kyle Lowry @Klow7 Nov 2 12h @RFeltonGBMS u shudent be talkin ur face look like 2 salisbury steaks stapled to ur moms fat ass #burned Raymond Felton @RFeltonGBMS 12h @Klow7 dont talk bout my mom…
Read MoreJonas Valanciunas 16 Points/4 Dunks Full Highlights (1/8/2014)
Lots of NBA players have a signature move. Dirk’s Fadeaway. Kanter’s up-and-under. Curry’s chuck-a-horrible-contested-three. They can go to those things if their team needs points. Jonas Valanciunas had the “mini-pump-fake-at-the-elbow-hope-defender-bites-if-not-do-it-again-and-drive-for-a-dunk”. One of the first highlights I ever saw of him in his rookie year was this exact move. Though I kind of feel like its…
Read MorePatrick Patterson 18 Points Full Highlights (1/3/2014)
Patrick “Tupat” Patterson is one of those players who just gets thrown in with deals. A trade sweetener. For good reason. He can shoot mid-range jumpers, and sometimes threes, at a pretty consistent rate. That right there is enough for him to stick in the league forever. Any team would want him, but he’s not…
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