November 2013 – Page 8

Joakim Noah 18 Points Full Highlights (11/15/2013)

Are the Bulls better without Derrick Rose? This is a serious question. I’m not trying to hate or anything (hating a sports team or its players is ridiculous and a symptom of our conflict-driven society, but I’m rambling). I know it’s early in the season, but Rose has been absolutely awful, he’s getting outplayed by…

Jared Sullinger Career High 26 Points Full Highlights (11/15/2013)

My scouting report for Jared Sullinger used to read something like this: “Big guy who likes to shoot jumpers but isn’t particularly good at them. Can rebound. Next Charles Barkley?” My scouting was totally wrong, apparently. Because Barkley could never really shoot threes. Sullinger is apparently pretty good at them.I don’t think the rest of…

Andrea Bargnani 24 Points Full Highlights (11/14/2013)

“Come on Andrea, don’t you want to help mommy pick out some cereal?” Andrea Bargnani didn’t move. He was stopped in the pasta aisle, staring intently at one particular product. His mother grabbed his hand and tugged gently. “Andrea, let’s go.” “Can we get some of this?” The five-year-old Andrea asked innocently, eyes remaining fixed…

Khris Middleton Career High 19 Points/4 Assists Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

So, apparently, Khris Middleton is a starter-quality player in the NBA. Well, yes and no. How the Bucks define “starter-quality” and how the rest of the league defines the term are two very different things. Bucks: Starter-quality. Adjective. A human being, at least six feet tall, who is capable of sustained periods of running and…

Marcus Thornton 24 Points Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

“Marcus, do you ever feel like maybe your conditioning isn’t at the point where it should be?” coach Malone asked. Marcus grabbed hold of a handful of nacho chips, dunked his fist fully into a container of cheese sauce, and crammed the entirety of his fist in his mouth. Chewing noisily, he managed a garbled,…

Greivis Vasquez 17 Points/12 Assists Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

One of the weirdest statistics of last year was that Greivis Vasquez lead the league in total assists. Injuries to the elite point guards helped his cause, but still. It’s like that year Jerry Stackhouse lead the league in points; he was a good player, but would anybody put him in the top tier of…

Tim Hardaway Jr. 14 Points Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

I’m gonna be honest here, I don’t really know a whole lot about Tim Hardaway Jr. I know his dad was a pretty good point guard in the 90’s. I think he may have gone to Michigan. Or Michigan State. I get the two confused sometimes. He can definitely dunk. And shoot threes. Those are…

Andrea Bargnani 20 Points Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

Last off-season I compiled a list of all the players ranked in order of how likely they were to be traded. Here’s the beginning of that list. 1. LeBron James 2. Kevin Durant 3. Ekpe Udoh 4. Andrea Bargnani Those other dudes at the top wouldn’t be traded because they were way to good and…

Timofey Mozgov Career High 23 Points/4 Blocks Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

“Hey T-Mo, great game tonight man! You’re really repping the homeland!” Timofey jumped. He thought he had been alone in the locker room. Hurriedly closing the laptop screen, he turned around to find Evan Fournier. “Thanks Evan. Proud glory of Rus’ flow through my veins like strong river, I guess. Haha,” Timofey said. “What were…

Corey Brewer 27 Points Full Highlights (11/13/2013)

I was surprised when the Timberwolves signed Corey Brewer this summer. They drafted him, he sucked, so they got rid of him. Then he had an okay year in Denver and all of a sudden they want him back? He looks and plays like he’s strung out on coke. He’s supposed to be a good…