March 2014 – Page 13

Tim Hardaway Jr. 28 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/10/2014)

In the midst of the nightmare carnival that is the Knicks’ season, there isn’t much to be happy about. Carmelo Anthony is good, I guess. But Stoudemire is old and overpaid, they have a lame-duck coach, Spike Lee exists, Chandler doesn’t care any more, they don’t have a pick this year in a stacked draft,…

Marcus Thornton 27 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

Marcus Thornton has been wildly inconsistent this year. With the Kings he had a 42 point outburst bookended by streaks of horrible games. And he hasn’t done much better with the Nets, alternating between good games like this and games where he scores under five. He’s always been a streaky shooter, so I guess this…

Steve Novak 15 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

OFFICIAL WHITEST THREE-POINT SPECIALISTS POWER RANKINGS: 1. Steve Novak 2. Luke Babbitt 3. Matt Bonner 4. Kyle Korver 5. Ryan Anderson 6. Jimmer Fredette 500. Anthony Morrow (R.I.P. Matt Carroll) (R.I.P. Jason Kapono) (R.I.P. Troy Murphy)

Andre Drummond 18 Points/22 Rebounds Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

So apparently Andre Drummond is no longer going out with Jennette McCurdy. It escaped my notice that that relationship ended a long time ago. I can imagine the conversation: “Oh Andre you have so many good qualities but how am I supposed to tell my friends that I’m going out with a guy who can’t…

Jeff Green 27 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

Whistling a made-up tune, Jeff Green once again consulted the cookbook. “Thinly” slice the potatoes? His hands were so huge that he doubted that he would end up with anything other than gigantic chunks, but he pressed onwards. His mom wanted him to learn how to cook, and by golly, he was going to learn…

DeMarcus Cousins 28 Points/20 Rebounds Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

For the first time in a long time, the Kings appear to have a core they can build around: Cousins, Gay, and Thomas. These players all have deficiencies, but it’s a start. Cousins in particular is a big question mark. He kinda looks like this: ?. Does he contain within him the discipline necessary not…

Kelly Olynyk 18 Points Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

Kelly Olynyk sat staidly at his keyboard, nestled in a corner of his cramped studio apartment. His rookie salary easily allowed for nicer accommodations, but he preferred the tight space. Not as much room for unnecessary possessions. He was playing a melody that had appeared in his mind during the night. Playing, tweaking, repeating. Fiddling…

Kyle Lowry Triple Double 20 Pts/11 Asts/12 Rebs Full Highlights (3/9/2014)

The Raptors commentators describe Lowry as someone who has a lot of “intensity”. Which explains why he pisses the opposing team off all the time and is always seemingly itching for a fight. And why he has the reputation (unearned?) of being a team cancer. But does it explain his rotundity? Is his intensity highest…

Drew Gooden 13 Points/1 Three Full Highlights (3/8/2014)

With this game, Drew Gooden is sending a loud-and-clear message to the Bucks: “You should never have amnestied me! Look at what I can do on a team that appreciates my talents!” However, this performance, like all other good performances that Drew Gooden has stumblingly put together, is mere fool’s gold. His complete unwillingness to…

Manu Ginobili 24 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/8/2014)

Going in for a layup as he had done thousands of times before, Manu felt confident in his ability to make the shot. He couldn’t get a clear look at the identity of the defender, but it hardly mattered; he could shoot it over almost everybody. Feeling some significant contact on his arm, he hit…