Drew Gooden just keeps having good(en) games. I don’t know how this is happening. I saw how bad he was in his last year in Milwaukee. I figured he was done. He’s not. Eventually his hot outside shooting will cool off. Probably. But that’s what I’ve been thinking for the past few games and it…
Read MoreMonth: March 2014
Chandler Parsons 19 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/20/2014)
Chandler walked into the locker room after the Rocket’s dominating win over the lowly Timberwolves. He was the only one there, as this was the VIP locker room, only for the best guys on the team. He sensuously took off his shirt, sweat dripping from his perfect muscles. His shorts went next, leaving him clad…
Read MoreMatthew Dellavedova 11 Points/10 Assists Full Highlights (3/20/2014)
“Oy! I just put some shrimp on the barbie!” yelled Spencer Hawes as he dug into the shrimp that came with his gigantic steaks. The rest of the team laughed as Spencer ate without regard for cleanliness or manners, except for Matthew Dellavedova, who sat sullenly without food in front of him. “Hey, Delly, Outback…
Read MoreDonatas Motiejunas Career High 20 Points Full Highlights (3/20/2014)
There’s apparently a lively, ongoing debate among the Houston Rockets commentator crew which was brought to the fore in tonight’s game. The topic: should Donatas Motiejunas shoot threes or not? There are arguments both ways. D-Mo is definitely capable of three-mo. Though he’s not really effective anywhere other than the corners. On the other hand,…
Read MoreXavier Henry 24 Points Full Highlights (3/19/2014)
Xavier Henry was a cool redemption story early in the season, wowing Lakers fans with a reckless driving attack and murderous dunks (R.I.P. Jeff Withey). But then he got injured and the world forgot about him again. Until now. Behold as Xavier scores 24 points on a mere 22 shots! Witness as well the sick…
Read MoreRoy Hibbert 20 Points Full Highlights (3/19/2014)
Am I the only one who takes joy in the Pacers’ recent struggles? I don’t like it when teams do well. I would rather they suck so that I can make fun of them. Then, when it turns out that they were just in a slump, I can pretend that I never wrote any of…
Read MoreShawn Marion 16 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (3/19/2014)
I never watched The Matrix, because I’m always too busy making highlights, but allegedly, that movie portrays reality as nothing but an illusion that we are all plugged into. Then you can either take the blue pill to remain blissfully ignorant, or the red pill, which will rip away the curtain to reveal the ugly…
Read MoreAl-Farouq Aminu 19 Points/10 Rebounds Full Highlights (3/19/2014)
Al-Farouq Aminu was on his way to the locker room when a voice issued forth from a dumpster. “Psst, Al-Farouq! Get in here!” Startled, Al-Farouq looked into the bin to find Anthony Davis huddled in the bottom. “Man, I don’t know if we’re both going to fit in there. You look kinda cramped already,” Al-Farouq…
Read MoreTobias Harris 23 Points Full Highlights (3/19/2014)
I’m excited. Not because Tobias Harris just scored 23 points, though that is reasonably exciting occurrence. But because I have now received actual visual evidence of Dewayne Dedmon’s existence in the NBA. And man, let me tell you, he looks damn good. Dunks it every time he touches the ball. I can tell you guys…
Read MoreAvery Bradley 23 Points/6 Threes Full Highlights (3/19/2014)
Rajon Rondo has returned, and his pure point guard play has almost erased the pain of the “Avery Bradley at point” era of the Celtics. Was it the worst era in the history of this storied franchise? Probs. Avery Bradley can now return to what he does best: playing defense and shooting tons of bad…
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