November 2018 – Page 30

Monte Morris 15 Points Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

It has been brought to my attention that Monte “Monte’s Inferno” Morris has an astounding assist-to-turnover ratio, so I went and check it out. Indeed, the numbers are astounding for a second-year player who played just 25 total minutes in his first year: forty assists to five turnovers. Using advanced calculus and other, even more…

Terry Rozier 22 Points Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

The morose Celtics squad sat in a bus parked behind the Vivint Smart Home Arena. There was little talking, and certainly no joking or laughing. Most players were looking at their phones or had headphones on, zoning out to their choice of music. Everybody just wanted to get to the airport, get on the plane,…

Joe Ingles Career High 27 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

Hours after the game had ended, Joe Ingles carefully pushed open the door to the visitor’s locker room. The TV cameras and reporters were long gone; nobody would know about his exploits. Inside the locker room, it appeared that all the Celtics players had left as well, and Joe was disappointed; the player he had…

Derrick Rose 21 Points/5 Assists Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

Derrick Rose is averaging 19 points per game this season. That seems really high, considering how done everyone (especially the Jazz) thought he was last year, but it’s only a little bit more than what he averaged in New York two years ago. I don’t know why I have the impression that he’s been totally…

Kelly Olynyk 20 Points Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

First off: is that a frickin’ rubber band holding Kelly Olynyk’s hair back? Come on bro. Every dude with long hair knows that you keep spare hair-wrangling devices everywhere you can. Keep them in the car, keep them in your locker, keep some in your desk at work (not like he has a desk there),…

Dwayne Bacon 15 Points Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

Dwayne Bacon is one of those players whose just been forgotten about this season. I think there was some hype for him from his college days, maybe I’m wrong, but if there was, it’s gone now. He was such a low-volume “scorer” in his rookie year that it was hard for me to scrounge together…

Miles Plumlee 14 Points Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

DTB UNEXPECTED HAPPENING ALERT! DTB UNEXPECTED HAPPENING ALERT! THIS IS NOT A TEST! SOMETHING VERY UNEXPECTED JUST HAPPENED IN THE NBA! DTB UNEXPECTED HAPPENING ALERT! REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A TEST! REASON FOR ALERT: MILES PLUMLEE JUST TOOK ANDRE DRUMMOND OFF THE DRIBBLE FROM THE TOP OF THE THREE POINT LINE! TWICE! When I saw…

Willie Cauley-Stein 25 Points/6 Dunks Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

I was all proud of myself for coming up, entirely my own, without the aid of any external resources besides the SSD I have plugged into a self-made USB port on the back of my neck, with the concept that this Kings-Timberwolves matchup was a showdown between two centers who played at Kentucky in college….

Mo Bamba 15 Points Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

It’s jumper time for Mo Bamba. I lost track of how many he made tonight. It’s gotta be less than 8, but not too much less. He was, dare I say, OWNING the ‘Zards with it. Dwight Howard, eat your heart out. You wish your shooting stroke was as smooth as Bamba’s. This single performance…

Jarrett Allen 18 Points/5 Blocks Full Highlights (11/9/2018)

I had this matchup circled on my calendar because of the dynamic center battle it contained: Jarrett Allen versus Nikola Jokic. Two polar opposites, clashing on the hardwood for ultimate ball supremacy. Who would prevail? The afroed skinny black pogo stick or the tubby transparent landbound savant? Let’s take a look at the facts.AF POINTS:…