December 2014 – Page 16

Lou Williams 26 Points/5 Threes Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Lou Williams sat in his apartment, brand-new saxophone in hand. “Lou Williams is a really jazzy name,” he thought to himself as he looked at the shiny bronze instrument. “I must live up to the jazziness of my name by learning how to play jazz saxophone, and then I will be Lou Williams, famous jazz…

Kemba Walker 28 Points/7 Assists Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Is Kemba Walker just a shorter version of Dion Waiters? They’re two guys who are in love with bad shots despite having the speed and ball-handling skills to get any shot they want. They can both get teammates involved when they feel like it, which isn’t very often. Both are currently shooting sub-30% from three,…

Enes Kanter 25 Points Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Wow, what a coincidence! As soon as shot-hogger and all-around malcontent DerrICK Favors goes down with an injury, the Kanterman goes and has one of the best scoring nights of his career! What a crazy timing of events that are probably not even related! Sarcasm aside, the Kanfaver combo hasn’t been as good as some…

Sergey Karasev 11 Points Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

I’m not sure I understand the train of thought that went into making Sergey Karasev a starter. Yeah, the Nets are short on small forwards right now, it’s basically him or Bojan. He’s also Russian, which is understandably appealing to the ownership. Those things should be reasons enough, but Sergey hasn’t shown anything at all…

Andre Drummond 23 Points Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Poor Andre Drummond. The one time he makes a free throw, it actually turns out that it might have been better for him to miss it. A cruel turning of fate. He made it, though, and the Suns failed to get a shot, and the Pistons won, so it’s all good. I can’t imagine that…

Rudy Gobert 9 Points/5 Blocks Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

This is what we’ve all been waiting for. The realization of Rudy Gobert’s immense raw talent. He may not have scored many points, that’s true, maybe if you weren’t a disciple of BSPN you would realize that there are many other ways to affect the game. Gobert, all seven feet of him, caused chaos in…

Ryan Anderson 30 Points/8 Threes Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Ryan Anderson considered New Orleans his second home. It wasn’t as good as California, the ladies, perhaps, not as voluptuous, but very nice nonetheless. There was just something about the vibe, the culture, that made him feel as if he was stranded in an exotic land of poboys and jazzbos. He looked up at the…

Andrew Wiggins 18 Points/1 Blocked MVP Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

Andrew “Wig Out” Wiggins really Wigged Out in this one. For a guy whose jumpshot was supposed to be maybe a little bit of a work in progress, he looked really comfortable out there. However comfortable he was, though, it’s no match to the level of comfiness I am currently experiencing as I type these…

Marcin Gortat 18 Points Full Highlights (12/12/2014)

“Hey pretty lady, want some of my homemade Polish kielbasa?” asked Marcin Gortat, approaching a randomly-selected brunette woman at the bar. “Ew, no, jerk,” responded the woman, making a disgusted face. As Marcin turned away, disappointed but not deterred from his mission, she muttered, “Men are such pigs.” There was another woman a few seats…